Timeout for Leadership-your one-minute leadership idea

Tip Sheet #47

Trading Places

You have just been promoted. In essence, you are in fact trading places.  You are just like Eddie Murphy’s character Billy Ray Valentine in his movie Trading Places.  You are headed to a foreign place. You are now the principal of your school.  Congratulations.  You have worked very hard for this day.  You are very happy.  Your family and friends are very happy.  So why isn’t everyone happy for you at your school?

Everything has now changed.  Every relationship you have made at work is now different.  Please do not kid yourself.  Do not delude yourself.  Everything is different.  Although you are the same person, your title after your name has changed.  You are now one of “them.”  You are no longer part of “us.”

I can vividly recall when this revelation hit me.  I was just promoted to be an assistant principal at my large high school.  Around lunch time, I wandered into the faculty dining room and sat with the group of “guys” that I had sat with for years. Something was different.  You could tell.  The conversation was different.  The levity was not there.  What had changed? My role within the organization had changed.  It took me several days to realize this.  I stopped sitting there and I am sure the “fellas” were as relieved as me.  They did not want to be seen sitting with an administrator.  It took many years until I was once again comfortable in my own skin to sit anywhere that I wanted.  It was their problem, not mine.  And yes, it was a culture problem for the school.

My relationships with my colleagues, my friends, were now different.  I cannot conclude if these relationships were any better or worse.  I just knew that they were different.  It is funny though, when I was alone one on one with some of these people, everything was just like old times.  But in a group, I was the perceived as the enemy.

People tend to be jealous and envious.  It exposes itself in many ways.  People also love to talk about other people.  And if you are the new principal, you will be the subject of many of these behind your back conversations.  Get used to it.  Toughen up.  Make sure your skin is bullet proof.  Because it you do not, you will not survive.  If you cannot shut out some of this nonsense, it will eat you up.

You must also stay off of any community blogs.  These too, will torture you.  Remember, in most cases, it is just a few angry malcontents sharing stories.  There is probably very little truth to it but it doesn’t matter.  People will tend to hear the loud voices.  You can see some of this playing itself out in the news today.  To those people on the blogs, and to the malcontents in your building, you know, those folks that are living on the “dark side,” the truth doesn’t matter.  I would strongly suggest that you somehow prohibit your significant other or any family or friend from these blogs.  You do not need to hear everyone running back to you with the day’s new gossip.

Leadership can be a lonely place.   It is especially lonely if you care about your job and you care about doing it correctly.  You must never lose track of the fact that you must continue to do the right things for the students, not the adults.  You have to keep your laser like focus on your job and just do it to the best of your ability.

Always stay true to the “force.”  It is the only place to be!